August 2011

New Beginnings:

Heaven above is signaling to you to expect a new beginning or positive change in your circumstances. These all-knowing and loving energies understand the circle of life. Sometimes, to begin your life intentionally and full of purpose there are situations you must end. Some people or projects may hold you back and zap your life force energy. So talk to heaven and give thanks to God, Jesus, Mother Mary, Ascended Masters of all faiths, your Angels, spirit guides and your loved ones who have crossed over. They love you unconditionally and want to simplify your life on earth.

"Heavenly Messages," from Lisa Reed-Hurtt, PhD

I will be on the Biography Channel in December with "I Survived Beyond and Back." Check out my Events page on my website for more information. Also, please join my Near Death Experience FB Page at http://ow.ly/5CDVZ

Time to Grieve

The deep pain that is felt at the death of every friendly soul arises from the feeling that there is in every individual something which is inexpressible, peculiar to him alone, and is, therefore, absolutely and irretrievably lost. -- Arthur Schopenhauer

Grief is an internal process that is individual, and therefore follows a path of its own making and takes all the time that it needs. For all we do individually and as a nation in the aftermath of the terrible tragedies in New York and Washington, D.C., we cannot ignore or hurry our grief. Grief is a complex process. When a tragedy occurs, not only do we grieve for the victims but, also, our own buried hurts may be reawakened. We re-grieve from our previous losses. Some say that the passage of time is the great emotional healer. In fact, it’s what you do with that time that is important.

During grief it is common to have many conflicting feelings: sorrow, anger, loneliness, anxiety, even guilt. Experiencing waves of these often confusing emotions can make us feel out of control. In an attempt to regain a sense of control, we may deny the feelings. Also, in our culture, we often assume if something is painful, it must be bad. Yet suppressing these feelings and denying the need to grieve can be even harder on both the mind and body than going through the emotions. Pain is a natural part of the grieving process and, if we are to heal, we must allow it. Death is not the only cause for grieving. A loss of any kind can carry with it the need to mourn.

When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight. -- Kahlil Gibran

Seeking Help

We can help one another during the grieving process by talking about our feelings and listening to each other. Friends, family and especially support groups can provide invaluable comfort.

People need ritual. Lighting candles, gathering together for services or memorials, praying or singing together can provide an outlet for grief.

Spending time in nature can offer solace. Nature allows us to experience the ongoing cycle of the life/death process, and in this we may be able to connect to the larger order of the universe.

Writing in a journal or writing letters provides a place for us to set our feelings down in a concrete, physical way. Writing to the deceased allows us to say goodbye if we didn’t have the opportunity. Even though we may not have known them, writing letters to strangers for whom we grieve can be healing.

Ask for help. You may need the guidance of a professional grief counselor or therapist to help you work through the deep and sometimes confusing emotions that accompany the grieving process. The most difficult times may come months after the actual loss.

Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak whispers the o'er-fraught heart and bids it break. -- William Shakespeare

When Grief Turns to Depression

Depression is a natural part of the grieving process. But when depression lingers or intensifies you may need additional help and counseling. Be aware of symptoms such as a deepening depression, loss of energy, sleep disturbances, changes in appetite, and feelings of restlessness, worthlessness or inappropriate guilt. If thoughts of suicide occur, seek professional help immediately.

Earth has no sorrow that Heaven cannot heal. -- 2 Corinthians 1

How to Talk to Children

Children assimilate emotional pain and deal mentally with death in small doses. They will add layers of understanding as they develop emotionally and intellectually. Consequently, their grieving may take years, even into adulthood. In the case of tragedies such as the terrorist attacks or sudden accidents, children need to know that these events are very, very rare. They need to be assured that what happened is not going to happen to them. Use age appropriate vocabulary and give enough concrete information to help them understand what took place but not so much that they get overwhelmed. At times of loss, children need familiar and trusted adults around them to encourage them to share their feelings and to talk about those who died. The process of grieving can be freeing. By embracing it, we have the opportunity to grow stronger so that when we must grieve again we will not lose our emotional bearings or retreat in fear. We will be able to release our hold on the past and move more fully into the present.

Sorrow makes us all children again -- destroys all differences of intellect. The wisest know nothing. -- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Author's content used with permission, © Claire Communications